Do you know what it feels like to be unsupported or outright sabotaged by your boss?
I’ve had this experience, and more than once!
In each case I was meeting or surpassing expectations, but inadvertently threatening my bosses.
And, in each case, different factors were at play.
In one I had vastly more organization-building experience.
In another, I was very successful at turning a demoralized team around.
In a third, I was re-invigorating program operations with notable results.
And, in a couple of cases, as a female, I was being too dynamic!
Here’s what happened:
My accomplishments were claimed by some bosses, who took and/or accepted the full credit.
I had bosses who would try to psychologically subvert me by confusing or manipulating their directives.
There were situations when I would be directly attacked with unfounded claims or unkind comments in the presence of others.
In one case, my boss shocked the whole team by asking me to resign from the organization because “I wasn’t a good fit.”
Right now, I have a number of clients who are facing similar situations.
This is particularly hard for clients who are or have been managers themselves.
I currently have an international client who moved to a non-managerial remote role to meet her needs for work/life balance. It is her first time working in an American corporate environment, and she is struggling to be productive under a very difficult boss.
She expressed frustration to me because, having managerial experience, this is not how she previously handled her own direct reports.
I asked about her approach to managing. She declared: “A manager is supposed to be the wind beneath your wings!”
When I asked what that means, she answered:
* It is actively engaging, guiding, and supporting your direct reports.
* It is being a thought partner when needed to help your direct reports solve a problem or complete a task.
* It is giving honest feedback in a productive way.
* It is being an active advocate for your direct reports’ success and professional growth.
I would say she’s straight up on a formula for successful people management!
Having been on both sides of the management fence, I deeply appreciate the challenges that can happen in a manager/direct report relationship, especially if a lack of self-awareness, maturity, motivation, skill, or goodwill exists on either or both sides.
So, in closing, I offer these questions for reflection:
Whether you are a manager or a direct report (or both), how can you be a better wind beneath the wings of your co-worker?
How can you align with each other so that both of you can win together?
What may also be cross-cultural accommodations that could help a work relationship be more productive and rewarding?
What steps can you take to uplift your situation?
Yours on the journey,
Martha